February 6, 2014

It is not easy to be the second born

I was born second, so the world I came into is nothing like the world a first born comes into. Everything is different, tried and tested.

In my "BIG" sister's words, I never had parents of my own. I had to share mine with my sister from the moment I was born, whereas she had 5 years of having them all for herself. Okay fine, I do have an extra person in the house to play with, and fight with. But see even here, it is getting all about her. It always does.
Time for me is not taught in terms of hours and minutes, it is measured in terms of what my sister does. So there is this time before she goes to school, and the time she comes back from school. And the time she plays, does her homework, and the time she goes to classes. My day is based around her schedule. And what does she tell my parents at the end of each day, that they love me more than her. Doesn't she see how it is, it is always all about her!

Have you seen our house? There are no pictures of me hung anywhere. There are so many of my sister in different poses, and when I ask them "Where is me there", the family goes in flashback mode with stories behind those pictures. "We will put up yours soon", they say, I have been waiting! My "new" clothes come out of boxes, books have a tear or two, toys have something always broken, it is rare that I get something new. I am always observing and thinking how will I ever tread on that path set by you.

I have heard my parents telling people how I make their heart melt, and my sister boasting to her friends how cute her sister is. But what is the point of all this cuteness I say! If only I could have been the first born and told my sister what to do! I try my best even now, reminding her every time of whatever my mom reminds me. She looks down at me and says "Remember I am seven Av, you are only two". How different is two from seven I say!

It is hard for me to look out at the world right now, for all I can see is my sister and right now she is my world.

-- Perceived thoughts of a 2 year old


Bhavani Kulkarni said...

Oh that is so true.....and will be true for a long time to come....;)

Ranjoo said...

hahaha.. Loved this post..
One thing i can tell Av is you will keep trying :)