Bliss

It has been so long since I have written anything other than To-do lists that I feel so tongue tied or finger tied should I should say! For some inspiration I have been reading a few of my previous posts and it almost feels like another person, another life. How time flies and situations change.

This one especially caught my attention, as it was written when A was around 9 months. I was amazed how I had made a note of every small thing she did then and how much time I spent observing and exclaiming about it. And here I am 5 years later with my little Av who is a few weeks shy of 9 months, kind of wondering oh really are babies supposed to do all that around this age!

And what with being a full time mom this time around, I had expected to note down every small thing she does. It is funny how being a parent the second time is so different from the first time experience. How some things just seem like second nature, how little effort goes into the day to day things with the baby. And the one on one time you get with the baby is so less. I wonder how such an obvious thing had never occurred to me before, this is why the second borns or last borns have the personalities that they have.

My sweet little Av, yes that is the first adjective I can think of when I refer to her...Sweet. She is a people charmer with her smile and enchanting eyes. She loves being around people, can cruise through the day with hardly any naps and still keep her smiles intact (how can I take a nap and miss to see what A is doing), thinks baby food is the yuckiest thing man ever invented (give me what A is eating), does not care much for baby toys (dont bother to buy me any toys, I will play with what A has in her hands right now), thinks her sister is the world and wants to be like her right away.

And the most amazing thing about being a mom of two, is to watch the bond build between two people you care about the most. I think over the last 15 months or so that is what I have been enjoying and cherishing the most. Ever since we told A about the new baby in mimi's tummy I have watched her excitement and joy grow each day. From praying hard for a baby sister to coming up with a beautiful name for her, to drawing pictures for her on my tummy, to making small gifts for her. And the moment when she finally met her the look in her eyes that said, was all that you have been telling me really true, do I really have a baby sister now.
It is wonderful to see that love growing more each day. To think that I could give my little girl A this thing that I always wished for is such a satisfying feeling. And equally precious is to see a baby feel so much for her big sister in her tiny little heart. Seeing the awe for her hero in her little eyes is heart warming.

As much as I have been enjoying all this the past few months, my inner soul has been craving for some much needed writing. So hopefully I am back to stay this time around. But as of now now my day is made with an early morning hour of writing with the sounds of birds chirping and a mug of strong hot coffee with the kids still in bed. Ahhhh Bliss!

And then there were two!

My big kid A and my new bundle of joy Av.  And that is where I have been.

Spring Cleaning

The groundhog not seeing its shadow and the constant chirping of the birds promises that spring is near. Just what I needed as I was almost getting lost on a wrong path. There is something about a new beginning that is so exciting. I for some reason associate it with the smell of soil when it rains. It just brings a freshness to life. So its the perfect time for spring cleaning. And where do I start, right within!
With a lot of time in my hand these days it just struck me about how different I am from most people. And in the shock, I tried to be more like the majority to be a part of the crowd. And boy oh boy, I ended up making myself feel so miserable, I am never going back there again.
Lesson number one, I can never fit myself into any category of people out there. So I am just going to be myself and going to be mighty proud of that. And lesson number two, not many will really understand about who I really am. So I am going to stop getting frustrated about people not understanding me.
So with the strange being that I am with a combination of a way too matured mind and way too naive heart it is but natural for people to react strangely to me. They either think I am over and done with all earthly feelings and sitting in a rocking chair staring at my grave or they think I am too foolish for following my heart. Bottom line is I am not in the Rat Race. So quit pulling me in.
And yes if you have not already noticed it I have a more than perfect life. It did not just happen overnight, I earned it. And I deserve it. So if something about my life shakes you from the ground, re-root yourself, please do not try to uproot me.

And here begins my spring cleaning....That felt good! Now moving on to my refrigerator.

P.S - All references above are not intended to be made to any person living or dead. They are solely directed to the negativity in me. If anybody claims to represent the above mentioned the word for it is 'Coincidence'.